my own death
vineyards of moons,
a shallow depth
of the sea,
Venus sinks,
I drowned and cried
in my sleep,
died like the ocean,
born in split
minds,
like the magenta
of mother’s womb;
a vortex of nothing
fair and bony
for the ghost
of mine does not grieve
these amputations of mind;
absence of the moon’s bare-
bones,
I see the lizard limbs
of the moonrise
as I weep
like the island.
© 2020 lucysworks.com All Rights Reserved.
Written for the Free Verse Revolution prompt: lamplight terrors.
As well posted for the dVerse open link night.
Appeared in Top Three Sunday Best on FVR.
47 responses to “Five A.M.”
Oh my! I had shivers reading this! Those last two stanzas are incredibly visceral!
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Thank you so much. ❤
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What a talent you have! Thank you for sharing this wonderful creation with us 💓
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Aww, thank you so much! ❤ ❤
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You are most welcome lovely 💓
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There is such melancholy and loneliness here in your existential poem, Lucy. My heart goes out to this person.
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Thank you. ❤ My heart as well goes out to anyone who feels this way.
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You’re welcome 🙂
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may i share this?
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Of course! 😀
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Thanks. 🙂
https://grumpysgiftspoetry.org/2020/08/06/five-a-m-lucy-of-lucys-works/
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I thank you!
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Seems fair. 😉 I sent you a message on your site about a writing matter. (just to give you the heads up in case it gets filtered into trash or something equally flattering!) 😉
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Beautifully penned Lucy and very poignant for these times, I felt it could relate to Mother Earth too 💚
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Thank you. ❤ ❤
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You are great at arresting images – vineyards of moons, lizard limbs of the moonrise. A fever dream.
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Aww, thank you Sarah. I am glad you think that. I honestly was a bit doubtful with this poem! But, I’m so glad that it’s being received well. I thank you for your kindness and thoughts. ❤
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‘the lizard limbs/of the moonrise’ – wonderful!
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Thank you!
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“like the magenta
of mother’s womb;
a vortex of nothing
fair and bony
for the ghost
of mine does not grieve”
Wow! Just wow. I FELT that.
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Oh, wow, I’m so honored to hear that. I think that’s one of the things that a writer always hopes to hear, and I’m so glad to have accomplished that, it seems. The way you FELT my poem, it’s truly an honor! Thank you so much.
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I felt that as well 🙌🏼
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❤ ❤
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a mournful nightmare, touching and resonating with the contortion of emotions in our current pandemic … think you articulated many peoples angst ..
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Thank you so much. I really did want to capture those nightmare-ish feelings whether personal or universal to all. I find some lines in my poem do reflect the nature of the pandemic. Thank you for your feedback, as always. 🙂
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most welcome Lucy, you have a unique style and the more I read the more layers I see!
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Your loneliness cries in torment throughout your poeml
I love these lines…
for the ghost
of mine does not grieve
these amputations of mind;
absence of the moon’s bare-
bones,
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Thank you so much. Loneliness was one of the major themes I wanted to cover, and I’m so glad it carried through in the poem. I’m happy you enjoyed this piece. Thank you for your feedback!
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Your are very welcome Lucy!
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‘…amputations of mind…’ Yum.
The whole thing…Yum
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Thank you! 😀
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Your images are vividly surreal, and the 3rd stanza is exquisitely poetic, and throwing my thoughs into an ocean of turmoil
“died like the ocean,
born in split
minds,
like the magenta
of mother’s womb;”
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Thank you so much, Ivor. ❤ ❤
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You always have a way with words. Incredible work, Lucy! 🌹
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Aww, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. 😊
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I so relate to this poem, Lucy, as someone who wakes up several times a night, usually at three and five a.m. The imagery is beautiful and twilit, with the ‘vineyards of moons’, the ‘shallow depth of the sea’ and the ‘magenta of mother’s womb’. I particularly love the idea of the ocean being ‘born in split minds’ and the ‘lizard limbs of the moonrise’, the effect of the moon on humans and reptiles, perhaps a reference to our reptilian brain.
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Thank you so much, Kim, for your thoughts and feedback. ❤️
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Your view of death is both colorful and dramatic. I feel for your sense of isolation. I hope it dissipates with the day.
I wouldn’t mind being surrounded by moons myself. (K)
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Thank you, K. ❤
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Lucy,
I really adore this line,
“these amputations of mind;”
Thanks for your poem.
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I’m so glad. Thank you for reading it! 🙂
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Such sad, nightmare visions–but so vivd and surreal. (I suppose just like a nightmare!). 😏
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Hahaha! That is true. Thank you for your feedback. ❤ ❤
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[…] Five A. M. – Lucy […]
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This is marvelous. Gave me goosebumps and I feel the depth to the core of my soul. That’s the power of your words and thoughts.
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Thank you so much! ❤️💜
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💓❣
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