Phantasmagoric
red gold,
last breath to bind them
or myself–I’m not sure; a shadow is a shadow
then so am I until I vanish
into the winter of the bears,
I ask that you do not find me;
I want to be played by tragic lutes,
the first scene like the half of bread
the last scene, the final act to the sip
of wine over the ashes of her eyes
the mother ossification of itself
stealing yet another life
from her eyes—
play the hero or the key
in a dancing syllable from the shore,
neither satiated or hungered
silhouetted in bliss.
© 2021 lucysworks.com All Rights Reserved.
Written for the dVerse prompt: Let’s look to our middles and see if we can build in dramatic turns, open a new window, pick a sonnet or a haiku, write in blank verse or pentameter, just show us your best turns.
34 responses to “bliss or suffering.”
This is an epic, dramatic turn ….. well done, Lucy.
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Thank you, Helen!
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This is incredibly evocative! I love; “I want to be played by tragic lutes, the first scene like the half of bread the last scene, the final act to the sip of wine over the ashes of her eyes.”💝💝
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Thank you, Sanaa!
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You’re welcome! 💝💝
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❤️❤️
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I’ve always loved the word “Phantasmagoria” – it’s certainly a delight to see it being utilized as a crown for this twisting piece of poetry. Having followed you now for a week or so, I feel like I’m beginning to get used to the wonderful language you play with: the connections you seem to form from thought to word to image to screaming lamentation to self-embracing sigh. I’m delighted to read this aloud, wondering what you put in that I seem to pull out.
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Oh wow, Masa, thank you so very much for your thoughts! I feel honored that you could feel such way from my poetry. ❤ It means a lot to me and it pushes me to write even more.
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I like the shape of this poem. I see “a shadow is a shadow” sticks out and may be the outlying hero — or the key?
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Thank you and perhaps!
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🙂
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Lucy, so sumptuous for the mind! Always enamored with your writing, with your kaleidoscopic imagery. Admiration my friend, I remain your fan.
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Thank you, Rob!
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Fine write Lucy – such wonderful language (as ever) full of oppositions, full of brilliance. I love the turn – the first stanza – the cold withdrawal into the winter of the bears – and don’t come looking; the second stanza – such suffering memorialised in a play – (Hamlet-like I thought) – music, the communion and death. And then the coda – this could be terrible, this could be sublime – answers (and doesn’t answer) the problem of the poem. Phantastic.
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Thank you, Peter!
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Your poem[s] leave me hungered for more, Lucy. Every. Single. Time.
-David
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Aww, thank you David. ☺️
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Not sure but the poem seems to find turning redeemed by lysis, the benediction after the play’s last words that hangs somewhere, cathartic of the sum of losses. – “neither satiated or hungered / silhouetted in bliss.”
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Thank you! I love your analysis.
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I love the hide-and-seek of shadow-play in the opening stanza, Lucy, especially ‘I vanish into the winter of the bears’, which expands on the title and turns into the darker realms of your poem, and the final lines, which are my favourites:
‘in a dancing syllable from the shore,
neither satiated or hungered
silhouetted in bliss.’
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Thank you so much, Kim!
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some lovely dramatic turns of phrase too (“I vanishinto the winter of the bears,”) but the contradiction is what changes the mood:”
I ask that you do not find me;
I want to be played by tragic lutes,”
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Thank you, Laura!
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I love the turn from suffering to bliss here, Lucy! Poetry really delves into the heart of both, doesn’t it? Your poetry tends towards the darker side but it was great to find joy on the other side of darkness here! ❤️
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Thank you, Ingrid!
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Such beautiful language and dramatic turn!
I love “a shadow is a shadow
then so am I until I vanish
into the winter of the bears,”
I saw this is a play, the tragic hero reciting the first two stanzas, and then some sort of spirit/witch saying the lines in the italics like a prophecy.
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Thank you! 😀
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You’re welcome! 😀
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The twist from living shadow to heavenly being works very well.
You will have to excuse my sense of humor, but this line… brought to mind the old song, Another One Bites the Dust!
the mother ossification of itself
stealing yet another life
from her eyes—
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Hahaha, thanks Dwight. 😀
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The turn is really magnificent here, really a volta or a resolution, but then I also enjoyed the oxymoron in the winter of the bears which made me think of sleeping since bears are hibernating in winter…
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Thank you, Bjorn!
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what a wonderful poem ! i loved the word in the first line ‘phantasmagoric’ it really added to the vibe of the poem ! great work !
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Thank you so much!
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