I.
In my willing, I was
there: just as I pictured you,
and tempts me in a way
entertaining my heart
II.
Like the cat in the windowsill,
I want to remember
your face, the maddened rain
when you think you’re alone
you never are;
my cynical tongue says to wait
but I won’t
my flowers still bleed God, hear my prayers
please
III.
Memoir of madness;
I am too quiet
but if I reflected nothing
then I too was absent from the snow-white
aberration; if this is a leap of hope, then I breathe
it crawls onto my chest
abandoned when our stares meet—
hello,
please don’t—
This is temporary,
I know that; I’ll press flowers in your bed
the childhood of your home
to witness your temples, your silhouettes, your wounds,
your whispers;
[I’m] on your loveseat; there sits a book in your car
a mist which claims your hand; ancient hills and cattle
early morning, hungred; my death resigned
in her bedroom; a pharaoh’s whip on my heart, laughing, solitary like a bone-flute’s palette to the air,
to be born in fluttering meadows; your lips appear with mistaken blood; and a tissue on pink pores
a stretch of god
the arch, and barefooted memory
in an April of the tides,
aquiver, my delirium, it’s not too strange;
you’re mine.
© 2021 lucysworks.com All Rights Reserved.
Written for the 08/10/2021 dVerse poetics prompt:
Be voyeurs, peeping through windows and doors of a house, one that has no family connections, no memories of our own to call upon:
- conjure an imaginary house of any size, any place, any age
- fill it with an imaginary person/people past or present, or ghosts, or leave it empty with its history
- make it literal but move into the metaphorical if you wish
God, this was the worst thing I’ve ever written because of how uncomfortable it made me feel. The interpretation is literal; the narrator is stalking someone they want to romantically pursue, and I didn’t like digging into this mindset too much. However, I wanted to write a poem of this nature for a few days after having this version of Every breath you take in my head.
I’ll probably revise this later–something is nagging me to in the back of my head.
60 responses to “Every word you say.”
I found this poem haunting like I was a ghost in a house looking onto someone’s emotions.
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Thank you so much!
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Beautiful and haunting. I love this!
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Thank you, JYP! ❤ ❤
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Nicely done Lucy!
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Thank you, Dwight!
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You are welcome!
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❤ ❤
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Oh my! This required more than one reading and got more enthralling each time!
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Thank you so very much!
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Wow, the flow and fluidity of this piece is stunning – you took us all over, and then completed the poem just so. Empowering verse. Love it, Lucy. 💙
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Thank you so much, Jeff!
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Welcome, Lucy!!
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This line really got me: “to witness your temples, your silhouettes, your wounds, / your whispers” Just incredible imagery throughout.
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Aww, thank you so much!
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Nicely expressed!
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Thank you!
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You’re welcome 😍
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Really dark and haunting! The verses flow so beautifully while reading this, that’s one of your incredible talents. “to witness your temples, your silhouettes, your wounds, your whispers” This line was exceptional, such vivid imagery. It’s a delight to read your pieces Lucy, loved this ❤
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Thank you so, so much. ❤ ❤ It seems like a few others like those lines too, hahaha. 😀
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Doesn’t surprise me. Those lines speak so much with only a few words. I’ve seen you do that so often in your poems and it’s so magical.
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❤ ❤ ❤
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intersting
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Thanks.
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Breathtaking!!✨💓
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Thank you!
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i love how raw and tender this rolled but also the haunting vibe. felt like a prey being watched by a predator.
this line is powerful, Lucy: if this is a leap of hope, then I breathe
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Thank you so very much and that’s what I really wanted to convey: a prey being watched and stalked. So glad you could enjoy this piece, I always love reading your thoughts!
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you conveyed it effectively, Lucy!
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Thank you!
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I think it’s brilliant Lucy – it takes a special skill to inhabit a mindset which you yourself find disturbing!
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Thank you so very much—that means a lot! ❤️
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Yes its dark Lucy but of such imaginative proportions. The house is barely visible, just a see-through shell from the perspective of stalker and that is powerful when we think of our home as a place of safety and sanctuary even. So many fine lines here – this one struck particularly
“there sits a book in your car
a mist which claims your hand”
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Thank you so much, Laura!
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It’s disturbing because you’ve entered the thought patterns of another and that takes real talent.
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Thank you!
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Your words and verses are truly beautiful! ❤
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Thank you so much. 🖤
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This is stunning, Lucy. I just think you’ve captured the stalker’s mindset so beautifully and quite empathetically. I just loved so many lines from it. But I especially love Part II. Just awesome. No. I love part III too. I can’t pick out bits because it all needs to be there. It’s a mood. An irrationality. As you say, you’re in character.
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Aww, thank you so much Worms! It was weird getting in character for this one, but music helps me with that and how I see it playing out as a narrative.
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Yes, haunting indeed and it did give me the chills.
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Thank you! 🙂
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You are so welcome, Lucy. Not an easy subject to write on but you make it look effortless. ❤️
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Great poem! Really dark.
“Every breath you take” is a really creepy song. I had it in my mind recently too.
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Thank you! Ah, what a coincidence, I don’t know why it’s been stuck in my head these days to be honest.
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In my case it was the tune I needed for a bit of doggerel about friction 😀
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My goodness this is breathtakingly beautiful, Lucy! 💝💝 I especially admire; “Memoir of madness; I am too quiet but if I reflected nothing
then I too was absent from the snow-white aberration.”
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Thank you, Sanaa!
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Deep, dark, mesmerizing ~~ I loved every word. Your talent is boundless.
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Thank you, Helen. 😊
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in an April of the tides,
aquiver, my delirium, it’s not too strange;
you’re mine.
Great close Lucy! Yes, there has to be a delirium of hope oozing to meet the craving. In many instances, it comes in slow but still, there must be hope1
Hank
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Thank you, Hank!
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The witness… oh my! What an exploration! Hauntingly beautiful. Thanks for letting us read it as is. With re-reads it changes. Wow. TYSVM
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I thank you!
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Wow!
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Thank you! ❤
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After reading that it was supposed to be a stalker’s point of view, I re-read it and it made more sense. So haunting, you’ve written it beautifully! 🤎
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Thank you!
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Goosebumps, literally chills🙌
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Wow, thank you so much! ❤️
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