Pseudopsychosis.

Empty abandonment 
drawn to where it rains
I shun the cull of your words
I stand at refraction/rejection,

in memory, maybe I was 
on the drowning grave of anger,
maybe I was only an asshole.
Eyes like the Cheshire Cat;

this was an accident I’ve known too well.
I’m peeling off my skin
leave nothing
behind
atonement is
a blank slate
I was dripped
from the thorax and the Adam’s apple
of the tree

the illusion of a girl—“you have to climb the ladder.”
Interesting, 
now leave me alone

slow death
a cable
on the floor
sits beneath
my feet; boredom forms
in each breath

gravestone
not mine, I was born 
into my garden ghosts
into the death of my bone
the amphitheater; dad was wrong 
I’ll always be this way

turn away
cull the thoughts
wanting to go home.

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Written to this quote by Bo Burnham: “Interesting, now leave me alone.” This is part of a writing prompt called #InsideWithAlyAndBri which utilizes inspiration of Burnham’s “Inside.”

I don’t talk about it much, but a few of you may know that I have social anxiety. I used to play in band groups and the experience was interesting, if not pure hell. One girl told me I have to climb up the social ladder. I looked at her and said I wasn’t interested in that. 😂

I also turned part of it into a quadrille for a dVerse prompt too as I was unhappy with what I wrote. I’ll play with it some more eventually.